Tuesday, September 09, 2008

I'll Never Tell...

Dear Gossip Girl Diary,

Oh boy, what an exciting night! I love the feeling I get in the pit of my stomach as I leave my Hamptons manse for a new year of private school shenanigans, so last night's episode was TOTALLY RELEVANT TO MY LIFE! Here are some of my innermost thoughts on the show. Don't tell anyone, Gossip Girl Diary!

-Really, Nate's mom? You just lived your life in absurd, Hamptons extravagance like nothing was happening, and then mentioned in passing to your son that the federal government is doing an inventory on all your earthly possessions, while you cut lilies that your underpaid gardener put blood, sweat and tears into making look so lovely? Really? Jeez, sometimes I think there are no writers and they just make the stuff up as they go along.

-Oh wait, why don't you just sell those two living mastodons you have following you around as pets to some eccentric millionaire, Nate's mom. That should bring in the big bucks.

-Hmm. I am about to get on a coach bus for a 2 hour ride, but need a little snack. Let me weigh my options...a nutri grain bar? Nah, too convenient. Maybe a handful of delicious and nutritious organic trail mix. Nah, still way too practical. OH I know. How about a tray of gourmet, over sized chocolate covered strawberries. Nice. I definitely made the right choice.

-I really felt Nate's pain in his Ikiru inspired scenes. He just wanted someone to talk to...

-Vivian: What's squash?
Jeanette: It's like tennis, but both players are on the same side of the net, and instead of a net there is a wall.
Vivian: Oh, so it's stupid tennis.
Jeanette: Yes, they should definitely re-market it as such.

On a less disjointed note, Gossip Girl Diary, I am really enjoying the more aggressive Beatrice and Benedict sparring going on with Blair and Chuck. What I once deemed as over-the-top, shoddy acting is now coming across as campy brilliance. Keep it up, Leighton and Ed!



tanya said...

dear gossip girl, i have the insider's scoop! blake and penn were totally spotted today crossing the street at hudson and w 11th. she was "hiding" from the camera behind her man... could they have been doing the walk of shame? perhaps on their way home from an exciting game of squash?

Jeanette said...

Spotted, Tanya's blog on my blogroll. Will her entries be salacious enough for GG's dishy needs? XOXO

Vivian said...

Haha, I mildly object to this recapped conversation as it provides the reader with the idea that I had no idea what "squash" is. In fact, I went to college with a number of formerly-colonized South Asians who were into squash. But true that I did not know the rules. And that it IS stupid tennis.