Wow! Wowee wow wow wow! What a shit show of a Survivor episode! I loved it! You may think Mark Burnett is off his rocker, coming up with the most sensatonal stunts legally possible to get America to watch, and you're probably right, but Survivor grabbed this longtime but now wavering fans by the [hypothetical] balls last night!
Firstly, I almost threw up my delicious, homemade grilled cheese on wheat when Jonathan shared with Candace the prospect of it being the four "caucasians" left at the end. What?! I thought we were over that publicity stunt. I have spent the past few weeks marveling at how race went from being the main issue on Survivor Cook Islandsto being an almost non issue once the tribes merged. People were voted off because they were bat shit crazy (see Cao Boi), not because of the color of their skin. And of course it's a cracker that would keep the racial sentiments around. Perhaps I shouldn't be throwing that term around in light of Langliebgate 06, but I don't care!
AND if Jonathan's temporary posession by William J. Simmons wasn't enough, Jeff "I am second only to Ryan Seacrest in my reality show hosting abilities" Probst threw a curveball (or coconut, if you will) before the rewards challenge; all Survivors had a ten second opportunity to start a 'mutiny' by deciding to switch to the opposing tribe. Candance took him up on this so that she could be back with her BFFEAEAEs Parvati and Adam. BUT, at the last second Jonathan joined her. Good job, Candace, because Survivor is definitely all about making friends and not at all about strategizing to win a million dollars. Also, good job, Jonathan, because Survivor is all about following around a hot, blonde twenty something that wants nothing to do with the modern day Richard Hatch.
It doesn't matter what any of these pawns do, though, because Yul is probably the best human being to have ever walked the planet. Yul for President 2008. He'll be running for the AWESOME party.
The Epic and Crowded "Mudbound"
11 hours ago