Lost Casting Bonanza

Because Lost doesn't already have enough superfluous characters (Charlie, I'm looking at you), producers Carlton Cuse and Damon Lindelof have thrown buckets of cash around for three new cast members. Most promising of the bunch is Rodrigo Santoro, AKA the Brazilian guy Laura Linney ditched in Love, Actually to hang out with her retarded brother. I could see Rodrigo as a hot gay torn between his Catholic upbringing and his homosexualidad- that would at least correct the dearth of queer characters on the otherwise-diverse show. More likely, however, is that Rodrigo will form the fourth side of a boring ass love quadrangle with Jack, Sawyer, and Kate.

Oh, and apparently Rodrigo is considered the "Tom Cruise of Brazil." I can only hope this means he'll turn Charlie and Eko's abandoned church project into a Craphole Island Scientology Center.

There are also rumors that Natasha Henstridge, currently unemployed from the defunct Commander-in-Chief, will become a new Lostie. I'm wracking my brain as to how she'd be introduced into the cast. No way could she have been on Flight 815 - a hottie like that doesn't go unacknowledged for 60 days, only to suddenly emerge and shock everyone with her Canadian tatas and ability to plunge her tongue through the back of people's heads.

Finally, one Elizabeth Mitchell will also come aboard, apparently as a new love interest for Jack. WHY DOES JACK NEED A NEW LOVE INTEREST? Does he tire of Kate's two facial expressions? (They are: perturbed and pensive.) And, more pressing, why did only the ugly people on Flight 815 perish in the crash? Cuse and Lindelof's promotion of Social Darwinism is beginning to concern me.

I'm hoping these folks are all Others. Otherwise, there would be no logic to suddenly shifting the focus to them as previously overlooked crash survivors. Because why, viewers would be forced to inquire, would the series have focused instead on the likes of whiny, drug-addicted hobbits, preachy, crybaby surgeons, and a fugitive played by the type of actress you hire when a blow-up doll is unavailable?